Tuesday, December 15, 2009

Here's why.

You may have noticed that I have to approve all comments before they are published on my blog now. If you don't see your comment here and are wondering about it, here's probably why:

1) You are a spammer or trying to encourage my readers to enlarge their penises. I'm sure they all have lovely peens. Not that I want to see them. I'm just saying.
2) You have just commented and I just haven't gotten around to approving them. I have like twenty jobs. I'm slow.
3) You're an ass.

Mostly, lately, it's been #3.

I know I put it all out there and, let's be honest here, that's why you come here. Would you really come to this blog if I said things like:

Today I went to Burger King. I had a double cheese burger without pickles. Then I went to Kmart and bought lightbulbs. I talked to my sister about her son. He's in fourth grade. I'm making soup beans for supper.

No, you wouldn't. If you did, you should be kicked in the head because that sucks. Who wants to read that? No one. Okay, maybe your mom. But no one else. I promise.

Let's not pretend this is something it's not.

You come here because I talk about the fact I can't get pregnant. You come here because the two children I have are freaking hysterical and I talk about them all the time. You come here because I admit that my marriage isn't perfect and that sometimes it just sucks. You come here because I talk about my fat ass and how hard it is for me to lose it. You come here because I'm honest.

I come here because I want to write about how I can't get pregnant. I come here because I love my kids and I want to document all the funny things they say and do. I come here because sometimes I feel like everybody else has this marriage thing all figured out, and I don't. I come here because I am freaking starving to death and it makes my head hurt and I want to bitch about it. I come here because I don't understand the world I live in and sometimes I need to be reminded that I'm not alone.

We use each other. It's cool.

That doesn't give you the right to abuse me.

That doesn't give you the right to hide behind the internet like a coward and not say to me what you want to say to me.

I don't mind discussion. I don't even mind being told you think I'm wrong (I may or may not agree with you, but I'll listen). I admit, fully, that I still have a long way to go. I admit I'm not perfect. I admit I make a lot of mistakes.

That doesn't give you the right to abuse me.

And, because apparently this needs to be said, even though I put a lot of stuff out there? This blog is not a total representation of my life. It's just not. My life is so, so much more than what I write here. If you don't like how many stories I tell about my kids, then don't come here. If you think I favor Boy Child, then don't bother (because, sorry, I do have a lot of stories about him but it's because he's an eleven year old boy and UP MY ASS CONSTANTLY). I don't. You don't live in my house and you don't know what goes on with me and I'm not going to try to justify it to you.

So we're clear, right?

You don't have to love me. But you can't be mean to me. Or my husband. Or my kids. You wouldn't say it to my face (and I know you wouldn't, because you are afraid I'd sit on you) so don't say it here.

28 comments:

An October Wife said...

100% exactly that.

Unknown said...

it's a shame there are people in this world who have nothing better to do than leave mean comments. my guess is they're jealous of you, hurting in some way and taking it out on you. plenty of us love you for the very reasons you write - if we didn't laugh, we'd cry. we don't have the marriage thing figured out any better than you do. my ass is fat and i can't give up the sleep that losing it would require, because i'm already only getting 4 hours/night.

keep writing. plenty of us need our Stephanie fix every day. and phooey on the mean people.

Bexterrific said...

Do I have to come down there and cut a b*tch? Cuz I will. I'm tough like that. No one messes with my family!

LzyMom said...

Too tired to really thing straight but love your blog, think you're amazing (you inspired me to get back on WW and yes I'm starving too) and I'm so glad that you give us such a candid glimpse into your life!

Sincerely, Jenni said...

Sorry you've been attacked by a bunch of assholes. Makes me wonder what type of lives those people have that they take the time to leave crappy comments on other peoples' blogs.

No one blames you for going "moderated." Just keep on writing, kiddo.

Intelligent Tool said...

It's sad that people are asswipes to you. I am sorry. You are 100 times better than they are anyway. Screw them. Haters.

elle said...

Good for you! It takes balls to put that out there, and I'm sorry that you had to, but good for you! I have a blog as well, and it has always mystified me as to why people who don't like what I say or how I say it keep coming back to read it. Why would they do that?

Allie said...

I hate that people come on the internet and think they can say whatever they want without consequence. People forget that they are talking to real people with real feelings. I've had haters before (I think you and I even talked about it once), they said mean things about me, my kids and my dog, who does that crap? I know you're not perfect, neither am I, and neither is the bitchy person that leaves mean comments. I feel bad for the anonymous haters because how sad does your life have to be to go around filling the internet with hate? Pretty sad. I say pity the poor, pathetic losers.

Anonymous said...

I love your blog, your sense of humor, and your honesty. I love that you say whatever you think. I think you're absolutely awesome. Don't let the haters get you down. Just ignore the douchebags. They are so not worth your time, chickie. I hope your day gets better. :)

Anonymous said...

are you serious that people are that petty to do that to someone they don't even know... F-THAT!

some people are just ass-hats...

I love your blog and love everything you write!

Rose

Kathy said...

I find it amazing the comments people leave when they feel they are anonymous. You are so right in saying none of them would say those things directly to you. As a friend once said, "if you wouldn't shout it in a crowded room, don't post it as a comment".

What a shame that you have to monitor yet one more thing in your life, but please continue to write and share. I love your blog.

Tarasview said...

preach it sister!

CPA Mom said...

well, that just sucks monkey balls.

CPA Mom said...

well, that just sucks monkey balls.

Anonymous said...

People suck. Except for you. And me of course. And the people we like. hehe

Mostly the assholes suck. Sorry you've had the pleasure of dealing with so many of them lately. But you were totally correct in saying if they don't like what you are saying they can just move the fuck on!!!!

Danielle said...

Is this because I said I've never had pecan pie?

Anonymous said...

This POST is why I read you. You're freaking awesome.

Write what you want, comments be damned.

Unknown said...

Good for you.

Lisa said...

The last time I saw anyone being mean was on your old blog.I read your blog every fricken day and I usually read the comments as well. I didn't see the nasty hater-remarks. And of course, since you're blogging about it, I'm all - what did they say? And bexterrific's comment had me laughing. I dunno why that kinda comment makes me laugh but it does.

How sad that people have nothing better to do with their life than to go around hating on others.
Sometimes I just feel like saying - for fuck's sake - just back off and chill if you can't be civil.

Thowwy I dropped the f-bomb, Steph...pmsing or sumthin.

SJINCO said...

What she said!

xoxo

Christina Berry said...

First of all, let me say that anyone who hides behind an anonymous comment is a loser. If you have something to say and really believe you're right, have the balls to put your name on it.

Second, you are so right that all we see here is just a little piece of your life. That anyone would think they know you well enough to judge your marriage, your family, or anything else about you is ridiculous.

Keep doing what you're doing. You're an inspiration to a lot of people, and the internet is a better place because of you. Don't let a few idiots run you off or change the way you do your business.

Jill said...

Sorry. Not sure how anyone could get anything odd out of your blog, I mean other than you, and you know you're odd, so that's a moot point, right? ;-) Take care, and do what you need to do!

Anonymous said...

I LOVE to hear stories about that Boy Child!

Peace.

Bethany said...

A-freakin-MEN!

Her Head in the Clouds said...

AMEN!

Nicki said...

Delurking to say that I may not comment, because I am apparently socially awkward even when it comes to comments, but I hope you don't think that all of us who lurk are in any way associated with the dinkwads who decide to heap abuse upon you. They are sad little individuals and, really, you shouldn't have to deal with their crap. I enjoy reading what you choose to share, and I hope you continue to share with us. Now, I must go hyperventilate in the corner because this whole commenting thing makes me anxious. :)

Dawn~a~Bon said...

Can I just give you a big Hell Yeah for that? HELL YEAH!

Tammi Collie (my real name) said...

I heart you. Seriously. That is all.