I'm tired of questions I don't have answers for.
I'm tired of my dads cancer. I want it to go away and never come back. Instead it stays and rears it's ugly, stupid head. I can't get things like weight loss to stay and be consistent. Only horrible things. Scary things.
I'm tired of the water here. I can't even wash my hair the same. My hair is pretty much my only redeeming feature.
I'm tired of walking into the grocery store and feeling a gigantic sense of panic. I don't know where anything is. It's alarming. I used to be good at groceries. In and out and back home in thirty minutes. Now I just wander.
I'm tired of being tired.
I'm tired of missing my friends. Of feeling out of place. I'm more tired of my kids feeling shunned, alone, and sad. I'm tired of wondering if I've screwed up their lives by displacing them.
I'm tired of missing my radio station, my park, and recycling cart.
I'm tired of feeling lonely. Tired of wishing that a great house made everything else great too. Tired of most everything, including myself.
I'm just tired.