One of the many, many problems with living in small towns (which, with the exception of my years in Knoxville, I've always done) is that everyone you know knows everyone else you know. This is great if everyone likes you. This is not great if you are, you know, human.
As I am quite tragically human, not everyone likes me. In fact, a fair number of people dislike me, including several that I have to deal with on a daily basis. It isn't fun and lately it stresses me out a lot. I try to deal with those day-to-day dislikers as little as possible, and I certainly don't interact with them on Facebook. Okay, I do tend to be a teeny, tiny, almost minuscule Facebook stalker. Okay, actually, that's a little bit of a lie because I totally stalk certain people and then email my friends so we can laugh at the people I'm stalking. But that's hardly ever, really. I promise. I really don't care enough about most people to spend a lot of time doing this. Also, I'm really busy and stalking is very time consuming. Allegedly.
Anyway, I totally wasn't stalking this time (really!). A friend re-posted something and I don't even know why or how but I clicked on the link and fell down the rabbit hole and then? I found something not very nice about me.
Okay, it really wasn't nice. It was most decidedly NOT nice. It was, as the nice ladies in East Tennessee might say, "ugly".
In the comments section, someone I don't know and have never met was accepting compliments from a number of people who were saying how fantastic and wonderful and special and Godly she is because of something she was doing or organizing or something. So, that's cool, right? Yay! Wow, I'm down with this Jesus fellow so therefore I'm on board. Sounds like she's a terrific person! We have a mutual friend. Probably several mutual friends! Maybe I'd like her too, since she's so amazeballs!
Somehow I figured out this person is married to someone I used to date a really long time ago. Like, so long ago I can't remember how long it's been, but it's been a really, really long time. Like, forever.
This lady, this super Godly wife, posted that every day her husband thanked God that he married her instead of the immature girl he used to date.
She seriously did.
(Oddly, the God I believe in wouldn't be cool with someone saying something like that. Just a random aside and perhaps not important to the story)
I don't know this lady. I do know I was the only person her husband dated before he married her (like I said, small town. Gossip. I've heard things). I've dated, um, several people since then and I'm working on driving yet another man slowly insane. Hell, I've been frustrating Jason beyond words for like fifteen years. This is ancient history.
So, seriously. Wut?
I'm no threat to her, like at all. I have no interest in her "man". I have absolutely, literally no idea why I would ever come up in conversation, even casually. Further, I have zero doubt that I was immature many years ago because 1) I'm immature now and 2) It was like twelve thousand years ago and I was pretty much an infant when all of this was happening.
So. Um. Sorry about your marriage lady. Other that that...I got nothing.
(Okay, so I do have this: I'm sorry you realize I'm way cuter that you and that makes you feel insecure)
(Okay, also? I'm sorry that your kids seem depressed and post things about how your husband yells at them all the time)
(Okay, and this? I'm sorry I looked at your kids pages too. But you started this.)
(Okay, also this. I'm not really sorry.)