Sunday, July 12, 2015


I keep talking about not judging people.

Talking. Maybe not doing. Not enough anyway.

I've been judgemental lately. I'm feeling bad about it.

I mean, it sucks. Right? It sucks. Someone said something really judgemental to me the other day and I got really offended. They quickly said, "Oh I didn't mean you!" but the damage was already done. They did mean me, or at least someone with the same life experiences as me. It's not fair and it's not cool and it was gross.

And sometimes I do the same thing.

Like, I was talking to Jason about someone we know and how I wish they would make better choices. That they deserved better and could do better and how hard it would be if they continue down the same path. How I love this person, so much, and I just want their life to be easier.

Jason listened, quietly, and then said,

"Well, you know, everyone has something."

Well, yes. We all have a past. Everyone has problems. Blah, blah,blah. But...

"I'm glad I didn't overlook you because you were divorced and had two kids at a really young age."

Yeah, he said that.

And everything I was going to say after "but"? Well, I kind of forgot it. He was absolutely right. Don't tell him I said that.

It's okay to want the best for the people you love, but honestly? Everyone makes their own choices. You just have to support them. You just have to love them and keep loving them. Even when you sometimes want to throttle them.

Judging others is gross. I am gross for doing it. My husband could have been really judgemental at me for being so snarky when I so frequently preach against it, but he wasn't. He was kind. He was loving. He reminded me of something important in a considerate way. Which I didn't deserve.

Today marks the 12th anniversary of the day we said "I do". I'm glad he didn't overlook me.

So very glad.

1 comment:

Jill said...

It's difficult, isn't it? We're dealing with church issues. I'm going in to talk to the new pastor and I don't even know where to begin. I just want to say 'they're all a bunch of fakers'.. but that would be extremely judgmental, and what does that say about me if I'm willing to say that out loud?