Tuesday, January 5, 2010

Life Lessons via "Teen Mom".

I know I'm really getting kind of old to be this obsessed with various MTV programs. But I am. I can't help it.

Teen Mom? Pretty much my new crack.

If you watched 16 and Pregnant (and I did) you are already familiar with the Teen Mom cast. The only girls from the the original series in the new one are Maci, Catelynn, Farrah and Amber. It's meant to chronicle their lives as teen mothers. I force my children to watch this every week and we discuss it. If by "discussing it" one means shouting at children to pay attention and keep all business in their pants, that is.

I really found 16 and Pregnant heartbreaking, especially Catelynn and Tyler, the bounced around little couple from Michigan who ended up giving their baby up for adoption. I cry every single time I see that episode and I wish every single day that the couple who adopted the baby? Would have adopted Catelynn and Tyler too. It's the most heartbreaking thing, watching these two kids, who as high school seniors have far more intelligence and depth than their parents (who got married to each other, if this wasn't all messed up enough), try to get through the day. I wish they could come live with me. I don't have much, but I would make them cookies and give them hugs. I think they need cookies and hugs.

Amber was one of my favorites on 16 and Pregnant and it's really been sad to see her decline so much on Teen Mom. I really think she's seriously, clinically depressed. She's acting out and it's scary to watch and scary to think about the little baby involved.

The one that hurts my heart the most, though, is Maci. The 17 year old mom from Tennessee.

She is, by far, the best mom on the show. They all love their babies, but Maci seems to actually ENJOY her time with little Bentley. The name sticks in my craw a bit, but the way she says it with her Tennessee accent is even kind of cute. And the accent? Please. Kills. I've lived in Tennessee for all but about seven of my thirty-four years and still aspire to sound so Southern.

Still, Maci has one huge HUGE flaw. Her douche canoe of a Baby Daddy.

It hurts me and I mean REALLY HURTS me, to watch these two interact. When she left him on a recent episode, I literally STOOD UP IN MY CHAIR and cheered.

Because she's still a kid, really. She's a great mom to the baby, seems to have a huge amount of patience with him, still goes to school, has a job, and seems really responsible (other than the whole "getting pregnant at 16" thing). She's a kid who can actually, probably go on to do good things with her life...including being a good momma to a sweet little boy.

Douche canoe went on a month long trip and when he returned? He barely even glanced at her. Didn't kiss her. Acted like it was nothing to be gone for a month. Didn't even speak to HIS SON. And then? Went out with his "boyz" for the evening. And danced really sluttishly with a girl.

She looked so sad. So resigned. So miserable.

So much like I used to look when my ex-husband did that to me.

She took him back, not because he tried. Because she felt like she wanted Bentley to have a dad. This guy doesn't give a CRAP about his kid. But she wants to do the right thing.

If you could see me? You'd see me waving my hand around. Because I did that. Or I tried.

I hope she's left him by now. Because he was such an weight around her neck.

I wish I could make her understand that she doesn't have to settle for this guy. That her life doesn't have to be sad and resigned. That she's beautiful and intelligent and deserves so much more than that asshole can provide her.

But I can't.

I can't any more than I could make myself understand that, when I was her age.


Katy said...

I love the show as well. It's on the DVR list of shows to record. Sshhh..dont' tell.
Maci and Catelynn are the only two that don't want to make me throw the TV out the window.
I know Amber and Farrah are young and in difficult situations and all...but Farrah actually pouted and STOMPED HER FOOT when her father told her that she needed to spend more time with her DAUGHTER! OMG!

Coal Miner's Granddaughter said...

I will probably purchase this show on DVD for my three kids to watch when they're older. Educational? Definitely.

Christina Berry said...

I only watched a few episodes of 16 and Pregnant, and was shocked that Amber is actually only about 20 miles from me. For over 12 years we lived in the crappy town where she currently lives - and thankfully we got out about 5 years ago. She'd do well to get herself and her baby out of there as well.

Michelle said...

You NAILED my every thought on this show. I love Maci. Although she is so young, her love for her child shines through.

Amber on the other hand, makes me want to scream! I am so glad you were able to find compassion with her and say she is depressed because all I can say is she is a Blankety-Blank. I know her maturity level is a bit different, but the way she speaks to her baby just KILLS me!

Anyways...stopping to blab now. GREAT GREAT GREAT reflections of the show!

insomniac ellen said...

I've never watched this show, but my daughter had her son at 16--and Mr. Spermdonor was out of the picture by the kid's 1st birthday.

We all rearranged scheduels and the like to help her finish high school and go to college at night. She is now almost 35, an awesome woman and an amazing mom. My grandson is a freshman in college and a wonderful young man. it's tough, but for my daughter, becoming a mom really helped her get her act together.

Anonymous said...

I caught an episode over the weekend and then? I got my ass on the computer and watched a few of the 16 and Pregnant episodes and the episodes of Teen Mom.

Maci? Love her. Hate Ryan. He's a dillhole.

Farrah? I want to crotch punch that selfish, slutty girl.

Amber? My heart hurts for her. Her "man" is a piece of dried dog crap.

Catelynn and Tyler make me sad. Her mother and his father (the ones married to each other) are HUGE pieces of crap.

Aunt Crazy said...

I've been watching it and making my teenaged kids watch it too and keep telling them to LEARN from these kids!!!

Bexterrific said...

This one was so good, Steph. SO good. I loved it. For reals. xoxo

Living said...

"APPLAUSE" to you for your thoughts!

Stephanie said...

Add me to list of grown ups who watch this show. I think I watched at first because it was "Sixteen and Pregnant", and that's how I got to be here. My mom? She too was 16 (well 15) and pregnant.
Farrah? Selfish little B*TCH who thinks her parents owe it to her to watch her kid all the time.
Amber? I think she has a low self esteem and that is why she stays with that dumba$$ boyfriend of hers.
Caitlynn? I heart her. She made a very grown up decision without a lot of grown up support. She is pained by it, but still knows it was the right choice.
And Maci? I love her. I love how she says, treats, takes car of, and LOVES BENTLEY. He is adorable. Her love for that baby makes me happy.

Deb said...

I love that you stood up and cheered, cause i did too!!!

Dawn~a~Bon said...

I need to watch this show. I was OBSESSED with 16 & Pregnant while I was 29 & Pregnant. The Caitlynn episode made me cry big, too. Even Scott got into it. I think I remember Amber from the 16 & Pregnant special with Dr. Drew. God, how i love Dr. Drew. d

Sarah said...

I watch this show too and I def. agree to your comments about it. I cheered too. Caitlynn and Tyler seem to have their heads on right and they seem to have so much love and respect for each other. I feel so bad for their family situation and wish I could just hug them.

I use to like Farrah but that was on 16 and Pregnant. Now I can't stand to watch her. I can't believe she won't stop partying.

I loved Maci on 16 and Pregnant and I love her now. She just loves little Bentley so much. :)

Amber seems to have very low self esteem and seems to want to stay just for the sake of it because she feels trapped. I understand her pain I wish that someone could help her out of her hole.

I'm glad I'm not the only one that watches this!

CottonSocks said...

Wait. There is a spin-off/follow-up? WTF? HOW did I NOT know this? I have to catch up. OMG. I loved (well, I don't know if that's actually the right word - was fascinated by? bemused by? appreciative of the fact that the show didn't make it all sunshine, roses and glamour?) 16 & pregnant, while I was pregnant with Gabe.