By Stephanie, age 37
Guy 1: You'll pry my guns out of my cold dead hands!
Girl 1: I cannot believe that anyone would ever want a gun! Wake up America!
Guy 2: Abortion is wrong! No one should ever have an abortion! Abortion is the worst thing ever of all time!
Girl 2: Keep your business out of my uterus!
Guy 1: Here are a number of pictograms that I have taken from various internet sources to show you my feelings on guns.
Guy 3: Gay people should never get married! God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!
Guy 2: It's MY Facebook page and I can write whatever I WANT on it! I have FREEDOM OF SPEECH.
Girl 3: Everyone has the right to get married!
Girl 4: Going to the gym!
Guy 3: Nuh-uh, Girl 3! The Bible says that they can't, and I believe in God!
Girl 3: You jerk, Guy 3! I believe in God and God loves everyone!
Girl 4: Look at my new haircut!
Guy 4: Everything bad that has ever happened in the history of all time is because of Obama.
Guy 5: Everything bad that ever happened in the history of all time was because of anyone who was president before Obama.
Girl 2: I love Obama!
Girl 4: Two guys at the gym were hitting on me! Going to pay my light bill!
Guy 2: God says abortion is wrong and no one should ever have an abortion.
Girl 5: This is how I feel today! *insert picture of Daffy Duck remarking on how much he loves Fridays*
Girls 6-9: *sharing picture of Daffy Duck from Girl 5* Amen!
Girl 10: Here's a picture of my adorable baby!
Everyone: OMG cutest kid ever!
Girl 4: Time for lunch! *insert photo of lunch*
Girl 2: Please delete me if you don't like what I have to say.
Girl 11: Here is a blog post I read last week that I think really encapsulates everything I feel about being a woman and mother.
Girls 6-9: *sharing blog post from Girl 11* Truth!
Girl 12: OMG, I hate that blog post about being a woman and mother that everyone is sharing. Here's another blog post that encapsulates my feelings on that first blog post.
Girls 6-9: *sharing blog post from Girl 12* Yes!
Girl 4: I wore this outfit last night and three guys hit on me! They thought I was totally younger than I am! LOLZ! *insert photo of girl in snazzy outfit*
Guy 6: None of the tragedies we hear about on the news are actually real. It's all conspiracy theories. Here are several articles from Wikipedia that prove I am right and you are wrong.
Guy 4: Here are several political cartoons which express my feelings regarding Obama.
Girl 4: Look how cute I am in my bathing suit!
Guy 7: WOOOOOOOOOOOOO! BEER!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YEAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Girl 13: Why are men such jerks?
Girl 4: Would someone just compliment me for the love of God?
Girl 9: You look really cute in that bathing suit Girl 4.
Girl 4: *frantically sharing fourteen pictures of herself* OMG you guys! People tell me how cute I am ALL THE TIME! It makes me blush!
Girl 14: I am really sad about all those people who died in the tragedy today.
Guy 2: You should be sad about all those babies that die from abortion.
Girl 4: I am so sad. But I don't want to talk about it.
Guy 7: WOOOOOOOOOO! EATING STEAK ON THE LAKE!
Girl 4: Lonely.
Guy 7: Why are women so complicated?
Girl 15: Here are several recipes for delicious foods.
Girl 6: I love all these things! *insert picture of a puppy and a kitten sharing the same teacup*
Girl 13: Does anyone know any nice guys? *changes relationship status to single*
Girl 4: I've never been this sad and lonely, but nobody ask me about it because I don't want to talk about it.
Girl 16: Here goes eleven photos of how drunk I got last night!
Guy 7: WOOOOOOOOOOOOO! GIRL 16 U R HOTTTTTT!
Girl 4: Didn't anyone hear how lonely I am?
Girl 9: I'm sorry you are lonely Girl 4.
Girl 4: I know who my true friends are! Did you see the picture of me in my bathing suit?
Girl 14: I just donated money to XYZ.
Guy 7: Will I ever find true love?
Guy 3: You should never donate money to XYZ. They support abortion and hate puppies and love gay marriage.
Girl 4: Why isn't everyone LOOKING AT ME?!!?!
Girl 16: Here goes my favorite Bible verse.
Guy 7: WOOOOOOOOOOO! MORE BEER!
Here's a picture of my dog. Wearing a scarf for some reason.
(Won't tell you which of the above I've been guilty of personally. I'm sure if you've ever seen my Facebook page, you already know.)