Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I am a ridiculously good mom. For reals.

This evening at dinner:

Boy Child: So and then? They showed these cats. And mom? Have you ever seen Aunt Susie's cat Raisin? I think he has diabetes.

Me: I don't think he really does. He's just overweight.

BC, snorting: Anyway, these cats? They weighed like 400lbs.

Jason: They weighed what now?

BC: Like 200 pounds.

Jason: Boy Child. Two hundred pounds?

BC: Or like 400 pounds. Whatever.

Jason: Boy Child. How much do you think I weigh?

BC, considering: Um...about 100 pounds?

(Um...no. Have you seen Jason? No.)

Me, almost hysterical with laughter: I'm not even going to ask how much you think I weigh.

BC, immediately: Ninety pounds. Oh yeah!

More hysterical laughter.

Jason, fist-bumping BC: What up, playah?

Me, getting teary-eyed: I've taught you so well.

BC: That's right. When you talk to women and they ask you how old you think they are or how much they weigh? You always subtract 10 years and forty pounds.

Me: I love you even more than I ever thought possible.

Jason: Well. He's going to do much better with the ladies than I ever anticipated.

Me, sniffing: I'm so proud.

Taking bids on him now gals. Taking bids on him now.


CPA Mom said...

DO NOT bid him out! You KNOW he is for my Bella !!!! xoxo You KNOW you want me for an inlaw :)

Bexterrific said...

I love that boy SO BAD! His mama too!

Unknown said...

Yup, boy child is awesome. As he should be, after all he's yours :) (ftr, girl child is awesome too, but we don't hear the stories about her :))

Unknown said...

DANG!!! My niece is just way too young.....

Jill said...

You're killing me, here. Thanks for the laugh.

Sharon said...

this is fabulous. I love BC.

Kim said...

SNORT!!!! And I am a lady who never snorts! (yeah, right)

the Yearning Heart said...

Tell them what they want to hear, kid! Till you don't need them any more.

tiffany said...

What a Smart Boy!!!
Btw he would love to see our fat cat...we have resorted to calling her fatty mcfatty instead of her name.